| | |||||||
» Nu verkrijgbaar in de uitvoeringen Classic, Silver en Vinyl
![]() |
| | LinkBack | Topic Opties | Zoek in Topic | Weergave Modus |
| | #1 |
| Competitive Bodybuilder | Kaz facts!
Dries heeft dit gepost op Forza en het stond een tijdje geleden ook Marundes board. Het heeft mijn dag weer een beetje beter gemaakt in ieder geval! Over Kazmaier: There have been no other godly strong individuals on this planet. Sansom, Hercules, all were Kaz in disguise. Kaz once punched the ground in England so hard, Stonhenge was knocked over. He put it back together in two minutes. One time, a driver hit Kaz while he was walking around, knocking him off his feet for a second. Now we have the car flip as an event. The top of Mount Everest grows every year to get away from Kaz. Kaz drank so much milk one day, he took the world's longest piss. It was so long, we now have the Grand Canyon. Kaz was hanging with Leonardo da Vinci when he got sick and projectile vomited all over some canvas in t he corner. This is now one of the most famous paintings ever, the Mona Lisa. Kaz bowls using a 350 pound Atlas stone. Kaz OHP max is you while doing your max. Kaz once ate an entire birthday cake, before his friends could tell him there was a stripper inside. Kaz is so bad, only he could protect him from himself. Kaz is actually the father of Svend, Magnus, Jouka, Zydrunas, Vasyl, and Mariusz. Kaz's farts are so strong that they must be sealed in lead containers and buried hundreds of feet below the surface Kaz sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled strength. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Kaz punched the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. They were going to add Kaz's likeness to Mt. Rushmore, but decided it should be larger than he is. Kaz pisses tacky after being the first man to load the mcclashen stones kaz laughed and said the it was harder to load his 2 balls into a jockstrap -than to lift and load all 5 of the mcclashen stones "one of my testicles weighs more than the 5th stone" they modeled the cables- supporting the golden gate bridge-- after Kaz's biceps tendons--an engineer stated the cables aren't quite as strong- but kaz's tendon strength gave us the idea A few years ago some guy said that Kaz throws like a girl. They're still waiting for him to land The local movie theater's screen fell apart, they asked Kaz if they could borrow his back at 7:00, 9:15 and 11:30 on Friday and Saturday One time Kaz went to the zoo and everybody thought the Rhino escaped Bill Kazmaier is an independent nation known for taking no prisoners Kaz didn't compete in the 1983 WSM because they wouldn't change the title to World's Strongest God Kaz doesn't puke...he expels weakness. This liquid weakness is actually a secret additive in alcohol which causes the phenomenon known as "beer muscles" and "liquor legend". To this day Kaz has only puked once, and the janitor that cleaned it up and discovered it's power is the richest man in the world. Recipe for Atom Bomb ------- 1 drop of Kaz tears ------- 2 pints of Icelandic blood Unfortunately, Kaz doesn't cry and Vikings don't bleed, so we have to make bombs the hard way. Kaz asked Edmunds for his beer one morning. Edmunds said no. Kaz punched him in the stomach and started throwing kegs out of anger. Thus the birth of the Keg Toss. Kaz also smashed some kegs, however this was too wasteful of the sacred contents to make into an actual event. Kaz's trapezius muscles shattered all mathematical possibilities. Scientist's have desperately tried to create an equation to understand them. No progress has been made and if nothing is solved by 2010...scientists around the world will lay down their calculators and compasses en masse and line up to be power slammed by Kaz. Kaz once clogged three hundred thousand toilets in russia after taking a PISS....in New York. Once, while Kaz was squatting in a commercial gym, somebody came over and told him that squatting that deep was bad for his knees. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake ever made. Another time, somebody dropped a pencil in front of Kaz, so he flipped out and killed the whole town. With the pencil. The Bible says that we are all created in God's likeness.... ... this is because it would have been too difficult for Him to create us in Kaz' likeness. Kaz has no failed lift attempts. We have had failed witness attempts. Kaz pisses liquid Kryptonite. He sends Superman a birthday card every year reminding him of that, which makes Superman cry. Kaz punched He-Man in the face and took his sword. That is all you need to know. Kaz licensed the nickname "Dominator" to Mariusz Pudzianowski. The payment - Mariusz's soul. Kaz applied to wrestle with the WWF thinking that he could finally legally make money for wrestling Lions and Tigers and Bears. He was disappointed to find out that the WWF he went to only had humans to wrestle...and that the World Wildlife Fund would only accept donations of kindness. Also oddly, Kaz mistakenly thought that he could wrestle Lex Luthor in the WCW, he was dissapointed to find out that it was Lex Luger and was told by Lex that wrestling is fake. Angry, he held down Lex Luger and let Superman beat him up. Then he pissed Kryptonite on both of them and yelled, "Nothing is fake in Kazworld bitches!!!!" Ungodly pain makes you see white......godly pain makes you see Kaz. Kaz crushed Hercules and Samson into a fine powder and used it to flavor his first steak. Chuck Norris tried to sell Kaz a Total Gym 14000. Kaz punched him, forced him get under 14000 lbs and try to squat, which crushed his legs and destroyed his roundhouse kick ability. Kaz then sold the Total Gym 14000 to the Devil in exchange for Chuck Norris's soul. Kaz is the only person that Hulk Hogan will let date his daughter. Kaz once took a dump and the microorganisms in the soil around it started to deconstruct the poo and evole at an extremely rapid rate. These microorganims are now the French. Hitler didn't commit suicide because he realized Germany had lost. He heard on the radio that Kaz was coming. If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around, does it make a sound? Yes, it screams because it knows that soon it will be a log that Kaz can toy with. the legendary husafell stone is actually one of kaz's kidney stones. kaz thought it would be funny to make people walk around a goat pen carrying it kaz invented the vikings and norse mythology to entertain his children the word "kazmaier" actually means superhuman strength in ALL languages After a workout in Pisa, Kaz felt he needed to stretch out a tight calf. As he pushed into a tower, it started to lean. The nose of the Sphinx in Egypt didn't fall off. Kaz punched it off because he "thought it looked better that way." Instead of sugar on his cereal, Kaz puts chalk.
__________________ "Maybe the other guys are bigger than me, but my back is stronger" (Jouko Ahola) |
| | |
| | #2 |
| Competitive Bodybuilder Geregistreerd: Apr 2006 Locatie: Nederland Geslacht: M
Posts: 1.535
Casino cash: €9300
Karma Power: 6 | Re: Kaz facts!
Zeker grappig Wel een beetje van Chuck Norris Facts gejat maar beter goed gejat dan slecht verzonnen en dat is zeker het geval hier
__________________ 'If you're gonna go from here to, like, Chicago, or whatever, just start fucking driving. You'll get there. You know, too many people are just sitting in their car all fucking confused. Just go. You'll figure it out, you'll see a sign. That's the problem, nobody wants to go. They're so paralyzed by all the information out there.' - Jim Wendler - |
| | |
| | #4 |
| Monstrous Giant | Re: Kaz facts!
de chuck norris facts waren ook al rip offs. En zitten niet veel dubbels in, zijn meestal nieuwe uitgevonden door de members van marundes forum. |
| | |
| | #5 |
| Competitive Bodybuilder | Re: Kaz facts!
Ik vind sommige echt ijzersterk...!
__________________ "Maybe the other guys are bigger than me, but my back is stronger" (Jouko Ahola) |
| | |
| | #6 |
| Freaky Bodybuilder Geregistreerd: Apr 2006 Locatie: Schotland Geslacht: M
Posts: 5.507
Casino cash: €16987
Karma Power: 26 | Re: Kaz facts!
|
| | |
| | #7 |
| Banned Geregistreerd: Apr 2006 Locatie: Nederland Geslacht: M
Posts: 3.257
Casino cash: €250
Karma Power: 0 | Re: Kaz facts!
Once, while Kaz was squatting in a commercial gym, somebody came over and told him that squatting that deep was bad for his knees. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake ever made. |
| | |
| | #8 | |
| Monstrous Giant | Re: Kaz facts!
Citaat:
__________________ Herinner Lauw "The good life is inspired by love and guided by knowledge" -Bertrand Russell Deu 25:5 Wanneer broeders samenwonen, en een van hen sterft, en geen zoon heeft, zo zal de vrouw des verstorvenen aan geen vreemden man daarbuiten geworden; haar mans broeder zal tot haar ingaan, en nemen haar zich ter vrouwe, en doen haar den plicht van eens mans broeder. | |
| | |
| | #9 | |
| Monstrous Giant Geregistreerd: Feb 2004 Locatie: België Leeftijd: 22 Geslacht: M
Posts: 10.915
Casino cash: €18946
Karma Power: 35 | Re: Kaz facts!
Citaat:
![]() | |
| | |
| | #10 |
| Huge Freak | Re: Kaz facts!
Zitte mooie stukjes tussen! |
| | |
![]() |
| Bookmark topic |
| Topic Opties | Zoek in Topic |
| Weergave Modus | |
|
|